Argument Writing-Are devices taking over our lives

For writing we have been learning to write an argument using the writing process. The topic was “Are Devices Taking Over Our Lives”.

Something I did really well in my writing was using conjunctions.(in bold)

Here is a section of my writing that shows this.

Devices are taking over many people's lives. Kids don’t go outside much, people are often on their phones, and in addition some people are even developing health problems related to devices. Furthermore, mobile devices also provide a platform for bullies.